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Deviant for 9 Years
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Newest Deviations

ceeSu by ByteManx ceeSu :iconbytemanx:ByteManx 0 0 DAFUQ by ByteManx DAFUQ :iconbytemanx:ByteManx 0 0 Hot Shit by ByteManx Hot Shit :iconbytemanx:ByteManx 0 0 Wii U Hopes by ByteManx Wii U Hopes :iconbytemanx:ByteManx 1 0 Master of Fear by ByteManx Master of Fear :iconbytemanx:ByteManx 1 0 Newscorp's New Logo by ByteManx Newscorp's New Logo :iconbytemanx:ByteManx 0 0 3 Pans Wallpaper by ByteManx 3 Pans Wallpaper :iconbytemanx:ByteManx 4 0 Koch Whores 3 by ByteManx Koch Whores 3 :iconbytemanx:ByteManx 2 0 Gov. Kasich Koch Whore by ByteManx Gov. Kasich Koch Whore :iconbytemanx:ByteManx 0 9 Koch Whores 1 by ByteManx Koch Whores 1 :iconbytemanx:ByteManx 1 3 Rush is going to Hell by ByteManx Rush is going to Hell :iconbytemanx:ByteManx 1 1 W the Comedian by ByteManx W the Comedian :iconbytemanx:ByteManx 0 0 Jon Stewart Custom Meme by ByteManx Jon Stewart Custom Meme :iconbytemanx:ByteManx 4 1 Still worth more than BJU by ByteManx Still worth more than BJU :iconbytemanx:ByteManx 0 1 Jeremy Danials Test sprite by ByteManx Jeremy Danials Test sprite :iconbytemanx:ByteManx 0 4

Favourites

Western Rider by Ca-Runi Western Rider :iconca-runi:Ca-Runi 4 0 Giant Food Painting by Ca-Runi Giant Food Painting :iconca-runi:Ca-Runi 3 0 Justice Mag - Supergirl by Artgerm Justice Mag - Supergirl :iconartgerm:Artgerm 31,718 1,513 That Brat by Sarky-Sparky That Brat :iconsarky-sparky:Sarky-Sparky 188 38 'That Brat' Walkthrough - READ ACs by Sarky-Sparky 'That Brat' Walkthrough - READ ACs :iconsarky-sparky:Sarky-Sparky 394 35 Anzu - First ever pixel art! by Sarky-Sparky Anzu - First ever pixel art! :iconsarky-sparky:Sarky-Sparky 62 22 20 Dollars Stamp by ChiiLuna 20 Dollars Stamp :iconchiiluna:ChiiLuna 138 99 It just won't work by annoyedslendermanfan It just won't work :iconannoyedslendermanfan:annoyedslendermanfan 148 97 Just stop. by annoyedslendermanfan Just stop. :iconannoyedslendermanfan:annoyedslendermanfan 265 307 Jay Fan Stamp by animal-nitrate Jay Fan Stamp :iconanimal-nitrate:animal-nitrate 182 8 Tim Stamp by MetamorphicFairy Tim Stamp :iconmetamorphicfairy:MetamorphicFairy 213 39 My beautiful dog by Ca-Runi My beautiful dog :iconca-runi:Ca-Runi 3 0 Portrait Sketch by Ca-Runi Portrait Sketch :iconca-runi:Ca-Runi 3 0 Got It!! by Ca-Runi Got It!! :iconca-runi:Ca-Runi 1 0 Invisible by Ca-Runi Invisible :iconca-runi:Ca-Runi 2 0 Smile, Everypony! by Sarky-Sparky Smile, Everypony! :iconsarky-sparky:Sarky-Sparky 852 98

Activity


  • Listening to: The Megas-Fly on a Dog
  • Reading: Wikipedia
  • Watching: my life go by
  • Playing: Nintendoland
  • Eating: food
  • Drinking: Pepsi Next
By the way, if anybody cares, it's my birthday today. I say "if anybody cares," because I don't.

Another year older, wiser, and still no closer to happiness. I suppose I should take joy in my fiance, and my 2 darling girls, and I do. But for the last half-decade, this day has depressed me. I'm not young anymore, as my back reminds me every day. My best days are behind me now. And besides good-looking kids, what do I have to show for it?

Not much.

Seriously, the score from "The Shawshank Redemption" keeps playing over and over in my head every birthday for the last long while. And while that movie is a testament to the ultimate strength of the human spirit, I don't know how much spirit I have left in me anymore. I believe that YEARS of pure mental discipline in controlling my Bipolar Disorder have finally failed. My mind races, my mood darkens, and while suicide is DEFINITELY off the table, some form of giving up seems inevitable if I don't do something. Trouble is, I HATE taking pills, and even put off asprin for that exact reason.

Maybe I'm just venting. But there's no birthday cake in my house right now, and I am glad. Another reminder of another year wasted in the pathetic dream of success seems so pointless to me. I bet no one even follows this journal anymore, either. In that case, I'm just venting my frustrations. If someone IS reading this, however... why??? Just... WHY???

Bah, it's just another birthday, and there WILL be more. I'm sure this funk will lift once Spring training games start, and all will be sunshine and farts again. In the meantime, I'll simply await my (late) birthday gift of Arkham City: Armored Edition.

Until next time (whenever THAT is), this is ByteManNeo on Miiverse, saying "Good night, and good luck."

Journal History

deviantID

ByteManx
JD
Artist | Hobbyist | Varied
United States
Current Residence: Centerville, Ohio
Favourite genre of music: Neue Deutsche Härte
Favourite style of art: Nude photography
Operating System: Google Chrome... I know, but I like it!
MP3 player of choice: Nintendo 3DS XL.
Personal Quote: aLL WILL BE WELL...
Interests

Comments


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:iconboudicah:
Boudicah Featured By Owner Jun 24, 2013  Hobbyist Photographer
Thanks for watch.
Reply
:iconbytemanx:
ByteManx Featured By Owner Jun 24, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
No prob.
Reply
:iconallies-smile:
Allies-Smile Featured By Owner Nov 27, 2012  Hobbyist Photographer
Thank you for the :+devwatch:
Reply
:iconmichaelcphotography:
MichaelCPhotography Featured By Owner Nov 25, 2012   Photographer
Thanks so much for watching me! Hope I never let you down!
Reply
:iconfovdphotography:
FOVDPhotography Featured By Owner Nov 24, 2012  Professional Photographer
Thank you very much for the :+devwatch: :)
Reply
:iconmatt-naphtha:
Matt-Naphtha Featured By Owner Oct 5, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
Well, I wish I'd tried to reconnect sooner, so the first message in forever didn't have to be about your MSN account being hacked. ^^; Hope you get to see this soon and switch to a new account or something.
Reply
:iconbytemanx:
ByteManx Featured By Owner Oct 6, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
I wouldn't know about that since I'm Android-based these days. Thanx 4 the info.
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:iconmatt-naphtha:
Matt-Naphtha Featured By Owner Oct 7, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
No worries C:
Reply
:iconsarky-sparky:
Sarky-Sparky Featured By Owner Dec 7, 2011  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Tag =3 [link]
Reply
:iconcassie-goodall:
Cassie-Goodall Featured By Owner Feb 8, 2011
thanks for the watch!
Reply
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